And if it feels like a fierce effort
to come into focus,
to actually see
all the way to the end of my thought,
to make the conclusion,
to set the course
according to what I now know
(instead of vague conjecture)
If it takes a fierce effort
so be it —
better the sharp blade of awakening
than suffocation by fluff.
©Wendy Mulhern
November 16, 2017
We take our small and steady steps,
we lose whole crops, we gain
(belated) diligence,
we come around again,
we reap our tiny harvests
and we prepare
for bolder steps ahead
In truth, it isn’t absence
that teaches presence,
nor does avoidance teach precision —
the confidence of mastery
is not learned through timidity
but boldness will bring forth
more of the same
Fill us, then, with presence,
let us be enchanted
with the strength and certainty
of our stroke,
let us live the boldness
of knowing who we are,
let us walk securely in our hope.
©Wendy Mulhern
October 3, 2017
I want to be satisfied
but not self-satisfied.
I don’t want to take my life for granted.
I want my life to be a quest,
a quest for more and deeper, truer,
of what is.
I have read, and I believe
there is no room for superstition
in understanding. I will endeavor
to place no weight on life’s events,
leaning instead
on the Spirit that is
the Life of everything.
©Wendy Mulhern
July 26, 2017
Light falls across your face
as trees outside sift sun
through their low branches
Late afternoon finds us here
refreshed, at peace, settled
into what has been revealed today
of steady power, solid strength,
sovereignty
In the end, we can only be
true, we can only emanate
what we really are.
We learn it here, in the centered
witnessing of each other.
We learn it here
in what we see
and what we give.
©Wendy Mulhern
July 24, 2017
There’s no turning back —
all the contexts, after all,
are so quickly forgotten —
those things we thought would be
so worthy to attain
no longer shining with the same allure
It’s not that I mind
the ease in my days,
the gentle cooling
in the summer wind,
the time to breathe in consonance
with bees and flowers
Just that what I’m called to
is something more
than what I had assumed would be enough –
more than ease and comfort,
more than entertainment,
more than heady thoughts
on how I think and feel —
I need it more than image,
more than branding, more than tribe —
something that will show me I am real.
©Wendy Mulhern
July 23, 2017
Well, it seems it’s still important
to be patient with myself,
to count the little victories
of smoothing of emotions,
the lessening
of all the old reactions
and a quicker rebound
when I fall
It seems I don’t get to suddenly
transcend my former self,
don’t get to be made new
all at once
It comes in flashes,
and they may grow more frequent,
may stretch out into longer stands of light.
Part of the learning
is equilibrium
and loving even what I leave behind.
©Wendy Mulhern
June 23, 2017
There’s no escaping
the alchemy of grace —
dark times as well as bright times
have brought me to this place
The strength that rose up clear
against the bleakness,
the shine of presence
where the light was dim,
the sustenance that came from perseverance
revealed the key to all-sustaining joy
Yes, I was sent
down cold and bitter winds,
yes, it was a path
I never would have chosen,
driven through a narrow pass
where so much fluff was driven out
and I could feel the spareness
of my bones
It’s only now, some two years later,
two winters’ thaw, two springs’ renewal,
that brightness rises clean
along the edges of my days
and in the vigor of my growth
I see where I have come
and count it all for grace.
©Wendy Mulhern
June 22, 2017
Today, once more,
a couple steps
to round up and evict
the voices of complaint
Outside a fine mist
has muted the sky
but not the ruling green
which flourishes
everywhere it’s been allowed
And inside, laundry
is not as massive as it was,
and though the same blocks
hulk up against my progress,
I have some newer tools.
There’s a way to trickle forward
and there’s room, right here,
for praise.
©Wendy Mulhern
June 13, 2017
After a while
we started to think we wanted
that one bright slice of day
we couldn’t have
We began to tire
of building our time around it
though it was quite reasonable —
Who, after all, is free
of all obligations?
And even if we were free,
the same discontent
that dogs us now
would nibble around our edges
in some other way
and try to take
this same kind of chomp
out of our satisfaction.
So no. Regroup and reconsider.
The victory, the release,
will not be from demanded time,
but from the sense of deprivation.
We can always have enough.
We are always given
just what we need.
©Wendy Mulhern
June 10, 2017
Stand at the right place
and the fractured colors
form a mosaic,
and bits of meaning
from other contexts
take on new roles,
defining something else
Love the pieces —
the memories, the skills,
the hard-earned softness,
and love the new creation —
all these parts of life from other times
joined to form the compass rose of now.
©Wendy Mulhern
June 10, 2017