I was wrestling my mind —
Oh, it was stubborn
and tenacious and strong.
It fought like something wild
struggling for its life.
I pried a finger up
but it grabbed back again,
harder, in another place —
It didn’t want surrender

I let it run awhile,
pacing like a caged cougar
along the old trails,
assuming, soon, the steady
disconnected trot
of one who must keep moving
but has no place to go

I challenged it: This is not
what you want, I said.
It turned to cling to me —
It would not listen
or let go

Till finally I saw
neither of us could win this battle
(so equally matched we were)
We had to give it up
for something higher,
Let ourselves, together,
be embraced,
be washed,
be tickled,
be home.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 2, 2015

photo by Jennifer Lopez-Santillana